Head of the House

I have reached 2 Chronicles in my Bible journey, and the last three books have been an account of the leadership of Israel and Judah.  It goes a little like this:  Bad king/judgement for the people.  Good king:  blessings on the people.  Sometimes the king experienced the consequences of a wrong decision, but for the most part, the people suffer.  For example, David took a census of his people because he wanted to see how strong his nation was- he lost sight of who gives victories (God).  David realized his mistake and sought forgiveness from God.  It was freely granted, but the consequences of his behavior were already set in motion.  God allowed him to choose what consequence would be exacted against Israel, and a plague killed many Israelites.  David, however, kept his life.  There are many life lessons to be drawn from this little piece of history, but the one that has my attention is the responsibility of leadership.
I think it goes without saying that when you lead people you carry a heavy burden of responsibility.  Greatness always trickles down from the top.  We see this in our presidency.  If something goes wrong in our nation, we look to the president to take wise action to fix it.  In the same breath, if something is worth celebrating, we thank our president for his quick thinking or smart planning.  It is the same for companies and schools- people look to the CEO or the principal- not the accountants and teachers.  Not that teachers and accountants don't have roles to fill within that framework, but when there is a problem, you look to the top.  Everywhere I look, I see people placing blame squarely on the shoulders of who is in charge- and if that person is at all worth their leadership position, they accept that blame and take responsibility for what has happened.
So why don't we see this in our own families?  Patrick and I have been discussing this at length, and we are firm believers in the "Man of the House."  We believe it is how God designed a family to function.  And we have also discussed that when there is a conflict within our family, it is on Patrick's shoulders.  I am starting to finally get to my point, which is really about the relationship between parents and their children.  Patrick and I believe that as parents, we are the CEOs.  We are responsible for what happens in our family.  We are responsible for setting the dynamic and maintaining that dynamic.  For life.  We will always be the parents, and Alaina and Lia will always be our children.  Of course, as they age, the dynamic will have to change, and we will be responsible for adjusting the settings on our family life.  What my parents have taught me is that the burden or responsibility for creating the opportunity for relationship resides within the parents.  In reality, it isn't much different than a king leading a nation, it is just a far more intimate setting.
Father, grant us the wisdom of Solomon to manage such a task- and the grace to accept the blame when things are wrong and need repair.

Conflict

So, Patrick and I are in the midst of a conflict that we really wish was not happening.  I truly believe that the real crux of the issue has more to do with a difference in beliefs than anything else.  Patrick and I are believers, but those we are in conflict with are not.  This presents quite the problem!  I think as Christians, we don't stop to think about how the Holy Spirit works in us- and allows us to see things that otherwise we wouldn't see- and know things we otherwise wouldn't know.  One of the problems that Patrick and I have discussed at length is that the people we are in conflict with hear what we say, but don't listen or understand.  They think they get it, but they are completely missing it!  How can you explain that?  Until I found this verse last night:

"Go to this people and say,
'You will be ever hearing but never understanding:
you will be ever seeing but never perceiving.
For this people's heart has become calloused;
they hardly hear with their ears,
and they have closed their eyes.
Otherwise they might see with their eyes,
hear with their ears,
understand with their hearts
and turn, and I would heal them.'"
Acts 28:  26-27

Paul spoke these words to the Jews, because although a lot of them lived in Jesus' time, they didn't get it.  Their hearts were hard, and to admit that they needed God's grace would be to admit fault.  Sounds very familiar to me... And Paul said he was going to focus on the Gentiles, because they were ready to receive Christ.

I have to say, being in conflict with unbelievers might be one of the most difficult situations in life.  We can't avoid it (as you may have guessed, it is family) but we don't know how to solve it!  Thankfully, we serve a God that is able to do immeasurably more than we could ever even imagine.  I know that He can work through all things to accomplish His will.  This morning, I was reading in 2 Kings.  My study bible was discussing Elisha's miracles- and how some where great- but some were very, very small- like removing poison from a stew so that all could eat of it and not be sick.  The note on this subject said this:

"Elisha's mighty miracles showed that God controls not only great armies, but also events in everyday life.  When we listen to and obey God, he shows us his power to transform any situation.  God's care is for all who are willing to follow him.  He can perform miracles in our lives."
Life Application Study Bible NIV, p 603

Patrick and I are waiting for a miracle!  We know that the Lord can solve this problem and any problem, and we are hopeful that this conflict will lead these people to Christ and His forgiveness.

One other small thing that I noticed in my readings in Acts- has to do with conflict and how we can get so wrapped up in our own problems we lose sight of reality.  When Paul was being persecuted for following The Way, the Jews said "this is the man who is causing riots and stirring up trouble all over the world!"  All over the world??  They were in the Middle East and the Mediterranean!  Hardly the scope of the globe.  Obviously, I know they lacked the knowledge that we have now about our universe, but even they knew that the world extended beyond the Roman Empire.  But isn't that true?!  When we are upset, we tend to bring the world down to our own sphere, our own set of problems.  When we do that, we are unable to see that God is bigger than our problems, bigger than the world.  It was a good reminder to me to remember that my conflict is not world-wide, it is just happening right here.  My God is bigger than this, and able to handle this conflict and all of the other ones happening across the globe.  What a comfort.

Jesus in my Heart

"You can't see Jesus, because He lives in hearts.  Only I don't want Jesus to bring in too many sticks to my heart, because that would give me a tummyache."                                              -Alaina (3 1/2)

I can't help but laugh at Alaina's thoughts about how Jesus lives in our hearts.  Given that we have been observing a mommy bird with her little baby birds in a nest in Alaina's playhouse, I am pretty sure she thinks Jesus makes a nest in our hearts!  

I read a really incredible book this past week.  It is called Riven, by Jerry B. Jenkins.  In the foreword, he says that it is his finest work.  As a writer myself- this really intrigued me!  Often, the works that I perceive as my finest- or my most favorite- are not the ones that are favored by other people.  I could see where the book was leading from about page 22, but yet I couldn't put it down!  I was drawn to the two lead characters because they were so unlikely.  And the marriage between Thomas and his wife was inspiring to me- and the reality of church work or being in the mission field was glaringly truthful.  I highly recommend reading this story- it really reinforces my current convictions that we consistently sell God short- we don't believe that He is capable of doing even more than we can imagine.  And we certainly believe there are limits on God's power and where and how He will choose to reveal Himself.  This book will challenge your beliefs- and hopefully open up your eyes to our amazing Lord.

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I have a new favorite song this week- I will post the lyrics.  It is by Laura Story, and called "Blessings"

 We pray for blessings

We pray for peace
Comfort for family, protection while we sleep
We pray for healing, for prosperity
We pray for Your mighty hand to ease our suffering
All the while, You hear each spoken need
Yet love us way too much to give us lesser things

Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise

We pray for wisdom
Your voice to hear
And we cry in anger when we cannot feel You near
We doubt Your goodness, we doubt Your love
As if every promise from Your Word is not enough
All the while, You hear each desperate plea
And long that we'd have faith to believe

Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
And what if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise

When friends betray us
When darkness seems to win
We know the pain reminds this heart
That this is not, this is not our home

Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
And what if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
What if my greatest disappointments
Or the aching of this life
Is the revealing of a greater thirst this world can’t satisfy
And what if trials of this life
The rain, the storms, the hardest nights
Are Your mercies in disguise

I think all Christians really struggle with disappointment.  We have trouble understanding why God would let us suffer when we are "Good" Christians.  This song is such a great reminder that all of those setbacks and disappointments we have experienced keep us on our knees- and keep us close to God.  We all feel that familiar ache around our hearts- when things just don't seem right.  That ache is God reminding us that our souls were meant for paradise- and goodness knows I need that ache to remind me that God is longing for me!  Listen to this song- transcribe it on your heart.